Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Southern Men

A young Southern boy goes off to college, but about 1/3 way through his first semester, he has foolishly wasted all the money his parents gave to him.
Then he gets an idea. He calls his daddy. "Dad," he says, "you won't believe the wonders that modern education is coming up with! Why, they actually have a program here that will teach Ol' Blue how to talk!"
"That's absolutely amazing!" his father says. "How do I get him in that program?"
"Just send him down here with $1,000," the boy says, "I'll get him into the course."
So, his father sends the dog and the $1,000. About 2/3 way through the semester, the money runs out. The boy calls his father again.
"So how's Ol' Blue doing, son?" his father asks.
"Awesome, dad. He's talking up a storm," he says, "but you just won't believe this: They've had such good results with this program, that they've implemented a new one to teach the animals how to READ!"
"READ!?" says his father, "No kidding! What do I have to do to get him in that program?"
"Just send $2,500. I'll get him into the class. "
His father sends the money.
The boy has a problem. At the end of the year, his father will find out that the dog can neither talk nor read. So he shoots the dog.
When he gets home, his father is all excited.
"Where's Ol' Blue? I just can't wait to see him talk and read something!"
"Dad," the boy says, "I have some bad news. This morning, when I got out of the shower, Ol' Blue was in the living room kicking back in the recliner, reading the morning paper, like he always does. Then he turned to me and asked, 'So, is your daddy still messin' around with that little redhead who lives on Oak Street?'
"The father says, "Son! I hope you shot that dog before he talks to your Mother!"
"I sure did, Dad!"
"That's my boy."

9 comments:

Bright-Eyes said...

hee hee heee!!!!!!

very nice.

NewYorkMoments said...

Southern dad's are so gullible.

badgerbob said...

bright eyes, thank you.I owe it all to lots of exercise, healthy food, and good genes.
Wait! Were you talking about the joke?

Nym,the nut doesn't usually fall far from the tree. Or the apple, if you're a descendent of Johnny Appleseed.

Willow, nothing like starting off your day, reading comments, left by a typing tree.

armaedes, sweet story? That's a pretty gay assessment, coming from a guy.

Anonymous said...

lol... you guys are hilarious.. "typing tree"...

lol

Anonymous said...

Armaedes.....kind of a sweet story...are you daft man....or are you a man....I wonder

Bob....I think maybe a descendent of johnny hayseed

morbid misanthrope said...

Too bad the kid had to shoot the dog before the father got to see him read and talk...circle of life, dude; circle of life.

badgerbob said...

JT, there sure are some weird characters aroun here.

random, I am beginning to wonder about that young man.First, the red shoes, now this.

morb, it's a cruel, cruel world.

morbid misanthrope said...

It is a cruel world, but sometimes shooting a dog makes life seem worth living.

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