Monday, March 06, 2006

The Dog Who Snored

Once, there was an elderly couple who had a dog that snored. Constantly annoyed, because she couldn't sleep, the wife went to the vet to see if he could help. The vet told the woman, to tie a ribbon around the dog's testicles, and he would stop snoring.

That evening, a few minutes after going to bed, the dog began to snore, as usual. The wife tossed and turned, unable to sleep. Finally, muttering to herself, she went to the closet and grabbed a piece of red ribbon and tied it carefully around the dog's testicles. Sure enough, the dog stopped snoring! The woman was amazed!

Later that night, her husband returned home, drunk again, from being out with his buddies. He climbed into bed, fell asleep and immediately began to snore loudly. His wife figured, that maybe the ribbon might work on him also. So she returned to the closet again, grabbed a piece of blue ribbon and tied it around her husband's testicles.
Amazingly, it also worked on him! The happy wife then slept very soundly.

A couple of hours later, the husband woke from his drunken stupor, and stumbled into the bathroom. As he stood in front of the toilet, he glanced in the mirror and saw a blue ribbon attached to his balls. He was very confused, and as he walks back into the bedroom, he saw the red ribbon attached to his dog's testicles.

He shook his head, looked at the dog, grinned, and whispered, "I don't know where we were, or, what we did, but, by God, we took first and second place!!

6 comments:

NewYorkMoments said...

The minds of men...

Badgerbob, what do you suggest I do...I own 2 dogs who snore. A female, and a male who's had his balls chopped off. Where shall I tie the ribbon?

badgerbob said...

Oh the cruelty! As someone who has nuts, or is nuts,(take your pick), I suggest you try it on a willing male friend , to see if it works first. Then, you can arrange for an operation, to have a ball transplant for your dog, to restore his male dignity.
As for the female, she just needs to get laid , a little more, and then you will see a significant change in her snoring.

NewYorkMoments said...

Badgerbob...you are such a mensch!

badgerbob said...

Nym, what's a mensch?
Is that a term of endearment?

NewYorkMoments said...

Badgerbob, I only call you terms of endearment.

A mensch is a wise and good badger (with a kinky side).

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