Monday, March 05, 2007

Priceless

While she was "flying" down the road yesterday (10 miles over the limit), a woman drove across a bridge, only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side, lying in wait. The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, "What's your hurry?"
The woman replied, "I'm late for work."
"Oh yeah?" said the cop, "what do you do?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher," she responded.
The cop stammered, "A what? A rectum stretcher? And just what does a rectum stretcher do?" "Well," she said, "I start by inserting one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch, until it's about 6 feet wide."
"And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole?" he asked.
"You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge..."





Traffic Ticket $ 95.00
Court Costs $ 45.00
The Look on Cop's Face. PRICELESS

3 comments:

NewYorkMoments said...

You said "rectum." Hee hee.

Anonymous said...

that was a good one.

morbid misanthrope said...

Time it took to pry the cop's nightstick out of her skull: five hours in surgery. Still worth it.