A guy walked into a bar and saw a gorgeous woman nursing a drink. Walking up behind her he said, "Hi, there, good lookin'! How's it going?"
Having already downed a few power drinks, she turned around, faced him, looked him straight in the eye, and said, "Listen up, buddy. I screw anybody. Any time, anywhere, your place, my place, in the car, front door, back door, on the ground, standing up, sitting down, naked or with clothes on, dirty, clean ... it just doesn't matter to me. I've been doing it ever since I got out of college and I just flat-ass love it."
Eyes now wide with interest, he responded, "No kidding. I'm a lawyer, too. What firm are you with?"
4 comments:
Hey..enough lawyer jokes!
Good one, Badgerbob. I luv screwing the lawyers.
Another form of courier service
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The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather dignified, well-dressed good looking man in his late 40s or early 50s. "May I help you?" she asked.
"I want to see Natalie," the man replied.
"Sir, Natalie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer someone else," said the madam.
"No. I must see Natalie," was the man's reply. Just then, Natalie appeared and announced to the man that she charged $1,000 a visit.
Without hesitation, the man pulled out ten one-hundred dollar bills, gave them to Natalie, and they went upstairs.
After an hour, the man calmly left. The next night, the same man appeared again, demanding to see Natalie. Natalie explained that no one had ever come back two nights in a row--too expensive--and there were no discounts. The price was still $1,000.
Again the man pulled out the money, gave it to Natalie and they went upstairs. After an hour, he left.
The following night the man was there again. Everyone was astounded that he had come for the third consecutive night, but he paid Natalie and they went upstairs.
After their session, Natalie questioned the man."No one has ever used me three nights in a row. Where are you from?" she asked.
The man replied, "Palm Coast."
"Really" she said. "I have family in "Palm Coast."
"I know," the man said. "Your father died, and I am your sister's attorney. She asked me to give you your $3,000 inheritance."
The moral of the story is that three things in life are certain:
1. Death
2. Taxes
3. Being screwed by a lawyer.
Damn! Again, I really should have been a lawyer. Because I'm in advertising I may be fucking people, but I'm not getting paid nearly enough.
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