This guy's at work when he receives a call from the hospital informing him that his wife's been in an accident. He rushes to the emergency room where he's met by the doctor. They sit down in the waiting room and the doctor, with a very solemn look on his face starts to speak. But before he can, the guy interrupts.
Guy: "Doc, don't tell me my wife's dead. I just can't take it. Really, I can't take it. I love her."
Doctor: "Well, sir, I do have some bad news."
Again the guy interrupts.
Guy: "Doc, just tell me, did she make it?"
Doctor: "As I was saying, we did all we could. Right now she's in a vegetative state, which is likely where she'll remain for the rest of her life. She can stay here overnight, but after that, you'll have to take her home because your insurance doesn't cover this type of thing."
The guy slumps, just crushed.
Doctor: "With the right care, which will include you feeding her five times a day, cleaning her and giving her constant care on a daily basis, she'll likely live for at least another 30 years."
The guy sinks even lower, just crushed, and starts to cry.
Doctor: "As I said, your insurance doesn't cover this kind of care, so you'll have to make some sort of arrangements to purchase the equipment you'll need for your wife. I would suggest you put your house on the market today and sell it as quickly as possible and buy a mobile home. You're gonna need the excess cash. It should be enough to buy the equipment your wife needs and for you to live on for the next couple of months. By then, you should be able to qualify for welfare and other forms of state and federal aid."
By this point, the guy is sobbing uncontrollably.
The doctor reaches over, puts his hand on his shoulder and says, "Hey, look at me."
The guy looks up and the doctor smiles and says, "I'm just fucking with you ...she's dead."
7 comments:
Whew! Thank god she's actually dead. That poor bastard would have been fucked like a prison bitch otherwise. I wonder if his wife had life insurance.
Insurance? That would cover about 2 weeks of medical bills. The medical insurance industry is one of the biggest criminal organizations in the world. The impact of the suffering they inflict on people's lives, make suicide bombers look like choirboys. Everything is covered , until someone gets sick, and then it's 'sort through the fine print', time. Fuck those bastards, and the lawyers that work for them.......But hey ! Let's not get started on that subject.
Badgerbob, your eloquence turns me on.
Badger
Did I hear you say something about f**king the lawyers? I knew that a long, long time ago.
I know insurance is a big joke--even though it saved my ass recently--but the insurance I was referring to was the good one. You know, the one where you insure your spouse for a large sum of money, and if something unfortunate happens to them, you get a ton of cash and move to an island somewhere.
Or get tossed in San Quentin, like Scott Peterson, and get a big burly con, as a replacement wife.
That was quite good.
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