An atheist was taking a walk through the woods. "What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!" he said to himself. As he continued walking alongside the river he heard a rustling in the bushes
Turning to look, he saw a 7 foot grizzly charging towards him. He ran as fast as he could up the path. Looking over his shoulder he saw that the bear was closing in on him. His heart was pumping frantically and he tried to run
even faster. He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but saw the bear raising his paw to take a swipe at him. At that instant the atheist cried out: "Oh my God....!" ;> Time stopped.
The bear froze. The forest was silent. It was then that a bright light shone upon the man and a voice came out of the sky saying: "You deny my existence for all of
these years, told others I didn't exist and even credit creation to a cosmic accident. Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?"
The atheist looked directly into the light and said: "It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps, could you make the BEAR a Christian?"
"Very well," said the voice.
The light went out, and the sounds of the forest resumed.
And then the bear lowered his paw, bowed his head and spoke: "Lord, bless this food which I am about to receive and for which I am truly thankful, Amen"
4 comments:
Ahh...religion. I'm not sure which religion is the MOST retarded. Muslims are pretty fucking stoopid. But the Hasidic Jews...oh my...wait...the Pentecostals.... All fucking weak minded retards.
If the atheist had prayed the bear be Catholic, he might have gotten away. Catholics can't eat meat on Fridays or they have to say 300 Hail Marys while jumping rope and miming the stations of the cross.
How about a vegetarian bear?
Oh dear...
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